We have recently started a new program called Executive Kungfu. It is focused on helping leaders and executives to find better ways to manage resourceful states using Neijia, internal martial arts. We help each executive to implement simple 10-30 minutes long daily practices that are given according to the current health conditions, the rest is worked out through a work out!

Where are your energy levels these days? What are your dominant emotions? Are you sleeping regularly? What kind of diet do you take? You may be surprised to know how much you can do for your mind by strengthening your stomach or to know that excercise balancing energy of liver will in the long run help you with anger management.

If you are not sure what kind of energy focus you need, check these quizes:

Are You Headed For an Energy Crisis

The Energy Audit for Leaders

Are you ready for kungfu?

The key to success is building rituals — highly specific practices that you commit to doing at precise times, so that over time they become automatic, and no longer require much conscious intention or energy. One example is scheduling regular time in your calendar for brainstorming, or for more strategic and longer term thinking.

The most recent ritual I added to my life is getting entirely offline after dinner each evening, and on the weekends. I’m only two weeks into the practice, but I know it’s already created space in my mind to think and imagine.

And if this article sparkled up your interest in building a new daily practice (ritual) into your life please check http://hbr.org/2007/10/manage-your-energy-not-your-time/ar/1

What kind of rituals do you have in your life that you think are hindering you? Smoking, eating unhealthy food, drinking, lack of sleep…?

What are the activities that recharge you? Reading, walking, laughing?

Have you tried some meditative practices?

Recently I have been using two tools to help with creative approach to life. One is Benrik Diary. In 2007 edition, for example, the week of June 11-17 it says:

This week, follow your body clock…

This week, let your body clock take over. Ditch all time-measuring devices, switch off your alarms and see how well your innate sense of time-keeping guides you. Lunch when you feel it’s lunchtime. Sleep when you feel it’s bedtime. Wake naturally. Dont’ ask what time is, and you’ll free yourself from its relentless march.

I cherish the days when I can do this, it is a fun way of getting connected with the present moment.

Another tool is a set of cards titled 500 THINGS YOU HAVE TO DO ONCE IN A LIFETIME

The card I picked to share with you states:

Conquer a fear

Keep a journal

Go see an illusionist

Go on holiday alone

Go on an organized pub crawl

Jump on a trampoline

See a Shakespeare play on stage

Watch a horror movie on Halloween

Declutter your home

Go skinny dipping

Today I am decluttering!

Navigate by joy and dance with Dragons

Happy Spring Festival (23rd January)

Max was the name of my cat in the US. I named him after my boss, the chummy guy Max. I should admit that I did not do a good job taking care of him.

So when Christi, a friend of mine asked me whether I would adopt her baby cat Baobao, I did not hesitate at all, out of guilt for Max. So when Baobao moved in, I renamed him Max.

Max was the best-looking cat in the neighborhood. He had long, yellow and white hair. He was very naughty. He would follow me wherever I went. When I cooked food, he would jump on top of the kitchen cabinet and watch me intensely – I had to share whatever I ate with him. When I washed clothes, he would lie down beside me, swishing his tail from side to side. When I brushed my teeth, he would jump onto the toilet seat and stare at me with his big yellow eyes. I knew it is important to keep him fit so I used a rag cloth to see how high he could jump. Day by day, he jumped a little higher.

While Max and I kept each other company, my mom came to Beijing and lived with me for half a year. She insisted that Max had bacteria and sent him away to a pet shop downstairs. I knocked at the door of the pet shop and the guy said that Max had been sent to Hebei. I suddenly felt very guilty and hoped that he was sent to a good loving family.

One evening half a year later, on my way home, I saw a little yellowish cat with a similar outward appearance. My first impression was that it was Max. “Max!” “Miao!” He answered pitifully. So I held him tight in my arms, thinking “I must be a good person. Otherwise how come God sent him back to me!”

The next day I took him to the vet only to find that it was a female cat. So it was not Max. I had a hard next couple of days debating whether I should help her or not. Worried that my mom would come again, I took her to the pet shop.

Time flies. Soon it was another year. One day I was jogging in the garden downstairs, Auntie Liu shouted “Come on. It must be your Max. Come and take a look. First I thought she was too old to recognize Max. Later on, I bumped into her again carrying a birdcage, saying that if she didn’t have the bird, she would have kept Max. So I hurried to her building, where I saw the familiar good-looking Max. “Max!” I called for him gently from a distance. His ears moved a little bit. When he sensed that I didn’t want to take him home, he stopped.

When I got home I took out his picture. Yes, it was Max. So every day I would go and feed him his favorite cat food, scratch him on the neck and nose, talk to him in English (It may sound weird but I do talk to him in English!), and play with him for a while.

REFLECTION:

What would it take for you to reconnect with somebody you lost connection with – an old friend, a lover or an old colleague? What was the reason you lost connection with them? If you could bring what you know now back to the past before you lost connection with them what would you have done differently? What would you have done the same?

What will you do as the result of this reflection?

Use this principle when planning projects or when caught in the web of thoughts. If your mind map of connections that need to be managed exceedes 5 bring KISS into awareness,  play Prince and dance until you are able to shake off all unnecessary details. Ok, dancing may not be your thing, or it may not be appropriate to do it in the office but you get the point: find an activity that energizes you, go for a walk, take a deep breath, meditate! or check our energy balancing instruction videos on the www.small-steps-neijia.com that will help you to get grounded and bring focus into perspective.

“It seems that perfection is reached not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away” Antoine de Saint Exupéry

Do you know that your thoughts, words and actions influence the way Earth spins even if you don’t interract with anybody? Take responsibility for what you do and who you are – Earth and humanity need you.

‘MORE’ from Nic Askew on Vimeo.

Thought (cause) = Emotion (effect)/ Emotion (cause) = Action (effect)

Thinking:
All is well;  Everything is unfolding as it should;  I am;  It’s just perfect;  We are one

Acting
actionless; balanced; cenetered; composed; connection; flawless; imperturbable; in equilibrium; infinite; limitless; perfection; poised; quiet; self-possessed; serenity; spacious; stillness; tranquil; unlimited; whole; witnessing

Remember the acronym AGFLAP-CAP:

Apathy/ Grief/ Fear/ Lust/ Anger/ Pride  -  Courageousness/ Acceptance/ Peace

and monitor how you shift on the scale of action. After the AGFLAP reactive cycle, CAP brings you to the proactive behavior. Often we mix Apathy with Acceptance, Anger with Courageousness and Pride with Peace.

How can you bring peace within? What are you strategies to remain at peace when others are in conflict (with self or others)? Do you know how to be actionless?

Wu Wei (wúwéi) is an important Daoist concept. It means knowing when to act, taking a natural action, and it can be compared with effortless doing – as trees grow or planets revolve around sun. This action does not have emotion or thought as a trigger, it is natural.

(Wikipedia quote): Wu may be translated as not have or without; Wei may be translated as do, act, serve as, govern or effort. The literal meaning of Wu Wei is “without action” and is often included in the paradox wei wu wei: “action without action” or “effortless doing”. The practice of wu wei and the efficacy of wei wu wei are fundamental tenets in Chinese thought and have been mostly emphasized by the Taoist school. The aim of wu wei is to achieve a state of perfect equilibrium, or alignment with the Tao, and, as a result, obtain an irresistible form of “soft and invisible” power.

There is another less commonly referenced sense of wu wei; “action that does not involve struggle or excessive effort”. In this instance, Wu means “without” and Wei means “effort”. The concept of “effortless action” is a part of Taoist Internal martial arts such as T’ai chi ch’uan, Baguazhang and Xing Yi. It follows that Wu wei complies with the main feature and distinguishing characteristic of Taoism, that of being natural. To apply wu wei to any situation is to take natural action.

“The snow goose need not bathe to make itself white. Neither need you do anything but be yourself.”Laozi

Thought (cause) = Emotion (effect)/ Emotion (cause) = Action (effect)

Thinking:
All is well;  Everything is beautiful;  Everything is OK;  Everything is unfolding as it should;  I accept you;  I have what I need as I need it; I love you just as you are;  It’s all coming together;  We all have a contribution to make;

Acting
abundant; accepting; appreciative; balanced; benevolent; caring; clear-sighted; co-creative; compassionate; devotional; embracing; empathy; friendly; gentleness; gracious; insightful; intuitive; magnanimous; naturalness; non-judgmental; orderly; receptive; satisfied; tenderness; understanding; warm; wonder

Remember the acronym AGFLAP-CAP:

Apathy/ Grief/ Fear/ Lust/ Anger/ Pride  -  Courageousness/ Acceptance/ Peace

and monitor how you shift on the scale of action. After the AGFLAP and reactive cycle CAP brings you to the proactive behavior. Often we mix Apathy with Acceptance, Anger with Courageousness and Pride with Peace.

How do you feel when you accept things as they are? What would happen if you accepted yourself as you are? Let people in your life know that you love them just as they are.

“The only thing that will make you happy is being happy with who you are, and not who people think you are.” Goldie Hawn

Thought (cause) = Emotion (effect)/ Emotion (cause) = Action (effect)

Thinking:
I can;  I can get it done;  I can listen;  I can respond appropirately;  I do what’s needed and it works;  I know we can;  I’ll do what it takes to make it work;  I’m willing;  I’m willing ot take risks;  It can be easy and effortess;  It is a s easy as it was hard;  It’s possible;  let’s work together;  We can do it;  We’ll find a way;  Yes!

Acting
able; aboveboard; adaptive; adventurous; bold; brave; candid collaboration; commitment; compassionate; competent; cooperation; creative; daring; decisive; dedicated; dynamic; enjoyment; exploration; flexible; focused; forthright; gallant; generosity; giving; goodness; gratification; honesty; humorous; initiative; inquiry; insightful; integrity; inventive; motivated; partnering; perceptive; persevering; persistent; playful; pleasure; resourceful; risk-taking; robust; self-sufficient; sharp; solution focused; spontaneous; strong; supportive; tireless; unpretentious; valiant; vigorous

Remember the acronym AGFLAP-CAP:

Apathy/ Grief/ Fear/ Lust/ Anger/ Pride  -  Courageousness/ Acceptance/ Peace

and monitor how you shift on the scale of action. After the AGFLAP and reactive cycle CAP brings you to the proactive behavior. Often we mix Apathy with Acceptance, Anger with Courageousness and Pride with Peace.

When were you courageous? What worked for you then? What lessons did you learn? How can that experience help you with what you are dealing right now?

“Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, “I will try again tomorrow.” Mary Anne Radmacher

According to the law of cause and effect:

Thought (cause) = Emotion (effect)/ Emotion (cause) = Action (effect)

Thinking:

I’ll just reflect!;  How dare you!;  I knew that;  I know everything;  I know;  I won’t associate with “those kind” of people;  I’ll look like I’m agreeing and to it my way;  I’m better than all of them;  I’m better than you;  I’m in a better place than all of you;  I’m not like them;  I’m right;  I’m smarter than everyone else;  I’m the only one who can do it right;  I’m the only one who can get it done;  I’m the savior/hero;  I’m too busy with important matters to have time for you;  It’s your fault;  Maybe I’ll do it and maybe I won’t;  My way is the only way;  What do tehy know;  What’s wrong with you;  Who do they think they are?  Why is everyone so incompetent;  You don’t belong;  You need me to get it done;

Acting

aloof; arrogant; bigoted; blaming others; boastful; bored; closed; complacent; conceited; detached; disrespectful; distant; dogmatic; egotistical; false humility; gloating; hypocritical; indifferent; know it all; narrow minded; never wrong; opinionated; patronizing; pompous; putting others down; remote; sabotage; sanctimonious; self-absorbed; self-centered; self-important; snobbish; spoiled; stoic; stubborn; stuck-up; talking against others; unforgiving; impenetrable; unreadable; unyielding; withdrawn; walk away;

STOP – CHALLENGE – CHOOSE
Stop: Ask yourself –  how do I feel right now? Use emotional     dictionary from previous  postings if you are not clear about your     emotional state. Feel the  feeling: where in your body do you feel  agitated, frustrated or vengeful? How  does that feel? If this   feeling was  a color what color would it be? Remain with the feeling and    watch it  transform.

Challenge: Are your  thoughts true? How can you know that what you    are thinking is absolutely  true? Who would you be if you didn’t think those thoughts?

How do you know you are better than all of them? Is it absolutely true that you are the only one in the world who can get things done? How do you know? Who would you  be if you didn’t   believe  this was  true?

Choose: What would you do if you loved yourself for who you are? How would that change the state you are in?

When you are dealing with a negative emotion don’t try and    get rid of it, its a valid part of you that wants attention simply    because there is an imbalance within, so you have to learn to love and      accept it.

Here’s a simple little saying to help you remember – When I love it, I move above it. Mark (Anup) Karlsson

Remember:

Emotions reveal the thoughts and patterns that seek attention.

Thoughts are not reality. Thoughts do not define you. You can choose what you think.

Actions speak louder than words (thoughts). Calm your mind and your actions will be more fluid.

Meditation, exercise and healthy food improve the quality of thinking.

“A  proud man is always looking down on things and people; and, of course,  as long as you’re looking down, you can’t see something that’s above  you.” C.S. Lewis